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<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\nCoaches help their clients examine and re-examine whatever sources of motivation they have mentioned. They help their clients revisit their desire to change and what drives it. They look at fear-based motivations such as not wanting to have an illness get worse, or not wanting to develop the maladies that have been prevalent in their family. They look at the love-based motivators like caring enough about ones self, wanting to be there for their grandchildren as they grow up, the intrinsic joy of dancing, swimming, tasting delicious and nutritious food, etc.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Perhaps the coach concludes, like their client, that these motivators just \u2018aren\u2019t enough\u2019.\u00a0The next step is to begin a usually fruitless search for additional motivators. Their client runs out of ideas and coaching descends into \u2018what about this?\u2019 suggestion after suggestion.\u00a0What is really going on? What\u2019s a more productive avenue to explore?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Your client may have enough motivation.\u00a0They may in fact, have listed three, four or more reasons they want to change. They may possess a terrific combination of motivators.\u00a0Motivation is like the fuel for a vehicle to run on. The problem might not be the fuel, but the lack of an actual vehicle! The vehicle is a methodology, a structure, and a process that facilitates change.<\/strong>\u00a0To get where they need and want to go, the client needs both a vehicle to carry them and the fuel to put in it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n How do we mobilize motivation?\u00a0By providing our client with methodology. I\u2019ve always been amazed at how simple successful change can sometimes be when clients have a well-developed way of achieving it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Coaches often hear their client\u2019s frustration at wanting to improve their lifestyle, but not having much of a history of success at it.\u00a0If we inquire if they have ever started their change efforts by first taking stock of their health and wellness in a really clear way, we find they rarely have.\u00a0If we ask if they have ever begun by first developing a\u00a0thorough plan\u00a0as to how they will make their changes happen, we often find them admitting that they usually just get their will powered amped up and set some sort of goals. Rarely have they ever carried out their change efforts\u00a0with the help of an ally who helped them with support and accountability. And, all too seldom have they ever keep track of their efforts at change and actually written it down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A mentee of mine was recently coaching a middle-aged woman who complained of a lack of motivation holding her back.\u00a0As we began listening to the recording, the coach helped the client describe at least four strong motivators that had propelled her into action.\u00a0She realized that when her children were younger playing with them had provided her with more activity and energy. Now her energy was low and she wanted to reclaim that. She also talked about hoping for grandchildren and wanting to be a very active part of their lives. The client was concerned about her advancing age and not wanting to lose the health she had. She didn\u2019t want to become a burden to anyone. She went on to list at least two more motivators.<\/p>\n\n\n\n As the client described her lack of success at change, her conclusion was that she was just lacking motivation. She described coming home from work tired and just fixing a quick (though not necessarily healthy) meal and watching television in the evening.\u00a0\u201cI just don\u2019t have the motivation I need\u201d<\/em>\u00a0the client lamented. She intended to be more active and intended to eat better. All she had for a plan were intentions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Doing a great job of coaching, my mentee gently confronted his client and recited the substantial list of motivators that she did, in fact, have. He questioned whether it was a \u2018lack of motivation\u2019, or something else that was missing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Clients try to figure out what is keeping them stuck. Unless it\u2019s a matter of identifiable internal or external barriers, clients often say it\u2019s a lack of motivation.\u00a0They are looking for an explanation and, frankly, they often don\u2019t know what else to call it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n An often ignored part of coaching is the work it takes to Co-Create The Coaching Alliance.\u00a0In addition to getting acquainted with our client and hearing their story, an important part of our first session with a client is to convey to the client just how coaching works. Clients are used to meeting with consultants, not coaches. They expect to be able to provide the consultant with lots of great information and hear the expert recommendations. We spoke about this from the coach\u2019s point of view in our blog post,\u00a0\u201cMaking and Maintaining The Shift To The Coaching Mindset<\/a>\u201d.\u00a0<\/em>The client also needs to make a mindset shift to get oriented to this new way of working with someone.<\/p>\n\n\n Coaching is about co-creating agreements. We co-create with our client agreements about how we are going to work together. Some aspects of our working together are negotiable and can involve compromise. However, we are not going to compromise the nature of our coaching relationship. That is, we are not going to agree to just be our client\u2019s educator, and let go of the role of coach.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Part of what an effective coach does is to explain, in a succinct fashion, exactly how coaching works, how it is structured and what the benefits of this structure are. The client-centered nature of coaching is conveyed with real reassurance that the client remains the one in the driver\u2019s seat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Part of the coach\u2019s job is to facilitate the client\u2019s use of the coaching structure.\u00a0The coach does this by showing the client how advantageous it can be to operate with a solid plan, to track one\u2019s progress at making changes, etc. The coach provides tools that make these processes easier. Mobile apps for tracking can be recommended and then, importantly, integrated into the coaching accountability.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Motivation can be puzzling and elusive, but when it is present a methodology, a structure, is what the client needs in order to mobilize it. By providing our client with the vehicle, we help them get where they want to go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Word Origin \u2013 Coach: In the 15th Century the Hungarian village of KOCS was the birthplace of the true carriage or \u201ccoach\u201d as the word evolved in English.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In other words we might define both types of coaches as:\u00a0A coach takes you from where you are at, to where you want to be!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Originally published on\u00a0Real Balance blog<\/a>. Reprinted with permission.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n
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