In the next five minutes prepare to have your life changed forever. First however, a recap from yesterday’s article. It was discussed that when you were born, there was undoubtedly a dream for your life. It was discussed that the dream was for YOU to become the BEST version of yourself. I then discussed how friendships play a vital role. To summarize, if your friends don’t encourage you to become the best version of yourself, it is likely neither of you are truly friends to one another.

I strongly believe another antagonist on your quest to become the “best version” of yourself is consumerism. Society, since the day you were born, has been working tirelessly to deliver you the message that the way to become the best version of yourself is to go out and get what you want. Society wants you to believe that there is scarcity and that your relevance is tied to what you have. It wants you to think you are incomplete without a huge house, fancy car, the latest clothes, and the best technology. Society does it’s best to tell you day in and day out that the path to happiness is through material things. How does that seem to be working? Take a look at society as a whole.

I have studied the results of this mythical thinking and here is what I have come up with. This thinking leads to sleepless nights, jealousy, anxiety, financial ruin, anger, and a mindset among many children that I am better than you because I have more. Just take a look at the news for about five minutes and see if this analysis isn’t spot on. You will find you can never get enough of what you don’t need.

Now that we have that out of the way, I’d like to share with you a path I have found to be wildly more productive. There was a mother and a daughter in my wellness facility earlier; the mother was in a back room working on her midsection. Her 3-year-old daughter went over to the water fountain and began to fill up two cups. I asked her why two cups? With a huge smile and acting completely on her own, she explained to me that her mother must be thirsty and was bringing her a cup of water all the while beaming with this gigantic smile. To put it quite simply, she was truly happy. It was a priceless moment. At 3, she understood what most people age 20 and above are clueless about, as society has fed them a huge lie. as a dream for your life to become the best version of yourself and all of the clues were present from that beginning moment. I will give you a mnemonic device to help you remember the clues and to completely reshape your life: P.I.E.S. Say to yourself I am going to eat “PIES” every day to be the best version, except we aren’t talking about the sugary kind here.

• P stands for physical needs. For instance, if you aren’t breathing, drinking water, and eating lots of nutritional foods, you probably won’t become the best version of yourself.
• I stands for intellectual needs. For example, if the books you are reading, television shows you are watching, and music you are listening to don’t inspire (breath life into) you, you probably won’t become the best version of yourself. Isn’t it disgusting that most children know about Harry Potter or Eminem versus the truly great leaders of our history?
• E stands for emotional needs. It has been proven time and time again that people who focus in on quality relationships are the happiest. Quit loving halfway and quit spending more time stressed about a job that might spit you out versus loving your family and friends. This will be a repeated theme and side note in all my talks. If you have to have a few drinks after work, YOU ARE IN THE WRONG PLACE. If your job requires you to drink and be out late at night to “seal the deal” you are in the wrong place. Lastly on this point, take a moment to remember 9/11. The people who chillingly knew they weren’t going to be spending another day on this Earth reached out to loved ones. In reaching out, it was to share messages of love and caring. They weren’t calls to the stockbroker to check account balances. Don’t wait till it’s too late to get this.
• S stands for spiritual needs and this ties into my earlier story about the girl and her water. Our meaning here is tied into what we do for others. Our spiritual side is an understanding of anything worth doing are the things we do for others.

Spend the next 30 days hitting one thing from each of the PIES and get back with me and tell me your life hasn’t endured a major positive shift. I would love to hear from you about how you are becoming the best version of yourself.

Register for Jonathan’s free webinar, “Your Essential Purpose“

Jonathan Dunn is a Senior Coach at Floyd Consulting where he helps leaders and businesses reach the best-versions-of-themselves. Jonathan coaches individuals and corporate teams to become fully engaged in their lives and work in order to achieve greater success and fulfillment. Floyd’s vision is to make work fun and engaging for as many people as possible, by delivering world-class training and creating dynamic cultures that lead to thriving businesses that are profitable, scalable, and sustainable. Jonathan’s passion and enthusiasm for helping people achieve their dreams is undeniable. His unique ability to connect and engage his clients in the pursuit of their best lives is one of a kind.

I was recently asked by somebody who is incredibly special in my life how I am always in such a positive mood… why I am always so happy. She was flat out interested in how I was able to achieve such a state. Now that we had known one another for over eight months, she was well aware it was not an act.

After answering her as eloquently as I could, I decided this would be some incredibly valuable information to share. Over the course of the next two articles, I will be breaking it down. Today, I will start with the segment I feel is one of the most important; Friendships. Please as you read it, don’t hate on me, but ask yourself if there just might be some truth to it. Ask yourself if your life seems to keep repeating itself. If some of the same issues keep coming up, an area to look at is friends.

When you were born there was a fundamental principle that existed…a dream for your life so to speak. Everything in your life will make sense once you understand this. The dream for your life is that you become the best version of yourself. The dream in no way shape or form is that you become a second rate version of yourself. This leads me to friends.

I want you to go home tonight and make a list of all your friends. After you have made this list, ask yourself, “How many of these people are my true friends.” This will make sense when asking yourself “Am I in alignment with the dream for my life of becoming the best version of me.” Your true friends will encourage, challenge, and inspire you to this end. A true friend will hold you to a higher standard. They are hard to find and are typically never “sheeple.” Don’t be upset when you find the list to be shrinking and shrinking. I made the decision in 2008 I wanted to be surrounded by love and by people who genuinely cared about me. I had to consistently ask myself if I was that person. It has been a daily habit to become that person and the rewards have been great. Every day ask yourself, “Am I helping my friends become the best version and are they helping me become?”

In case you are confused the following are examples of people who probably need to be crossed off the list. That is unless, of course, you like insanity in your lives. Non-friends encourage you to be a second rate version of yourself. Misery loves company! The following are examples of non-friends:

1. Your social time with them consistently involves drinking or overindulging. If you have to drink to reveal yourself, seek counseling. That is not how life was intended and can create co-dependency. Your best version isn’t hungover or vomiting.
2. They allow you to whine and complain every day about how bad your life is instead of encouraging you.
3. They abuse substances.
4. They create drama. Friendships and family should be safe places of love. Set boundaries and run from the ones who aren’t safe.
5. Friends always observe “Genshai.” This is a term I learned from Kevin Hall, Author of “Aspire.” It has been a game-changer. It means never treat anyone including yourself in a manner that will make them feel small. Stick to this 100%, don’t accept anything less and watch what happens.
6. Friends don’t encourage hedonism, minimalism, or individualism.

It has been said many times that courage is the one skill that holds you back from where you truly want to be. I believe this. Do you have the courage to weed out the non-friends from the real friends? If the answer to the earlier question on do you help those around you become the best version and do they help you become the best version ends with a no, it is time to take a hard look in the mirror and possibly move on. Concentrate on quality and not quantity. In the next article, I will be covering what I consider to be the next largest hindrance to happiness, consumerism. If you are interested in becoming the best version of yourself or enhancing your corporate culture, I would be happy to chat with you. Are you becoming the best version?

Part Two to this article tomorrow!

Register for Jonathan’s free webinar, “Your Essential Purpose“

Jonathan Dunn is a Senior Coach at Floyd Consulting where he helps leaders and businesses reach the best-versions-of-themselves. Jonathan coaches individuals and corporate teams to become fully engaged in their lives and work in order to achieve greater success and fulfillment. Floyd’s vision is to make work fun and engaging for as many people as possible, by delivering world-class training and creating dynamic cultures that lead to thriving businesses that are profitable, scalable, and sustainable. Jonathan’s passion and enthusiasm for helping people achieve their dreams is undeniable. His unique ability to connect and engage his clients in the pursuit of their best lives is one of a kind.